Locked Down in Love?

The idea of lockdown with the person of your dreams had much appeal. COVID, for some, was seen as a gift. A dream come true. Instead of spending hours commuting, we’re both going to be working from home, together. Instead of travelling all the time we’re both going to be at home, together. Instead of working back late, we’re both going to be at home, together.

But no one warned us this might be more of a bad dream at times. Coming up for ten months with no travel and no get out of jail free card, you now know the time of each other’s daily bowel movements. And nobody asked for that.

We had two choices really.  One, was to let every teeny thing, from teeth picking to rogue dishwasher stacking, grind you down until love turned to murderous thoughts. Or, learn to ignore the small stuff and work with the stuff that matters. You’re only going to take Door Number 2 if you really love someone. Because love is all about how much of the bad stuff you are prepared to tolerate.

Let’s take household chores. Apples delegate. Mangoes buy milk when it runs out. Limes rule, no one does it better. And Bananas lounge, hoping someone else will do it.

Under normal circumstances, these may not be grounds for divorce. But being around each other 24/7 puts a whole different spin on things. To you, Apple’s delegation becomes an obsessive need for control. Mango’s casual attitude means you have no milk for tea when you get up first at 5:30am. Lime’s nitpicky desire for perfection is completely unrealistic. And Banana’s laziness. Well!

There is no easy road to relationships my friends.

But here’s what we can do.

Understand your own challenges and how they may play out to your significant other.

Talk about your differences – though not in the heat of the moment. Talk about how you might be able to compromise on the bits that drive you mad.

Laugh about it. Laughter is our magical balm.